Murder Stalks in the Midst of Loveliness!

Note: The Gail Patrick film festival continues, having viewed If I Had a Million, The Phantom Broadcast, TheMurders in the Zoo, Death Takes a Holiday, and The Crime of Helen Stanley. In this picture, she plays private detective Sadie Evans. She has committed a B&E to steal back compromising material purloined from the hero by a blackmailing GF. “Marry me or I turn in your mother in for murder” seems a solid basis for connubial felicity. In contrast to this low Pre-Code method to land a husband, Gail is the only positive role model in the movie. As a resourceful PI, she is a trailblazer, self-employed in a male-dominated profession. She does the right brave thing, intervening when she sees a murder about to be done. And she pays for her intervention with her life. Why, the reader wonders, all this attention to a forgotten actress on what could be taken for a Perry Mason blog? Because in the Fifties and Sixties Gail Patrick Jackson was the executive producer of the greatest courtroom drama ever: Perry Mason.

Murder at the Vanities
1934 / 1:38
Tagline: “Murder Stalks in the Midst of Loveliness!”
[internet archive]

This Pre-Code musical features big productions of songs and dance routines peppered with a backstage drama and absurd murder mystery. Check common sense and good taste at the popcorn stand. Forget there’s a Depression on - enjoy the over-the-top experience!

The attractions work on many levels. The streamlined design of the 1930s can be seen in the display fonts and Art Deco furnishings. All the actors belong: without exception they have that ineffable allure that makes movie-goers pay attention to them. Be warned, however, that almost all the characters are obnoxious and tiring.

One wonders what the personification of sophistication is doing in this loopy production, but Duke Ellington and his band put swing into a rhapsody by Liszt. During this number, blacks and whites dance together which must have made the white supremacists and segregationists spout their mint juleps (a thumb in their eye was as good a thing then as it is now).

Other surreal dance numbers must be seen to be believed. Gape at the bizarre love song on the tropical island as the “dancers” wave fans of flowers to imitate ripples in a lagoon. The songs have clever lyrics though they have a tendency to have lots of words. Glowing with cheer, Eric (Carl Brisson) looks forward to the Repeal of Prohibition in Cocktails for Two: Oh what delight to / Be given the right to / Be carefree and gay once again. / No longer slinking, / Respectable drinking / Like civilized ladies and men.

The Pre-Code aspects are bold. First, hard-edged Gertrude Michael (Rita) sings “Sweet Marijuana,” a ditty that extols the calming effects of smoking wacky tobaccy. Second, two corpses are treated in a manner grotesquely offhand, as poor Gail Patrick is being lugged down the stairs like a trunk and we can see Rita’s dead face as she lies prone on a table. Third, there are battalions of scantily clad women.  Very young. Usually platinum blondes with waves and curls. Flawless fair skin from pounds of powder. Short with the tiny builds of yoga teachers. Dancing not much since a “vanities’ showcases appearance over genuine skills in the performing arts, the pretty women are objectified for decorative effect, commodities like the cigarettes and perfume in the number Where Do They Come From and Where Do They Go.

The last Pre-Code marker is that the moral atmosphere is lowdown and dirty. At the station house, the cops sit on their duffs and play cards. A homicide detective is easily distracted by all the half-naked chorines. He walks around with a hideous rictus of lust, hostility, and aggression on his face. In a typical harsh remark, the theater manager asks the detective, “Why don't you take your lamps off those dames and do a little police work?”

Backstage at the Vanities, Rita is not only a blackmailer and killer but also beats her maid. Two other women are murderers too, but it’s okay since the people they snuffed were bad people. One of those killers will get the best defense money can buy and scores of character witnesses. And the other killer will simply walk, her being so sympathetic and the victim was asking for it and it happened so long ago and an old lady in prison doesn’t make society any safer. The manager of the show tries to cover up the murders because he doesn’t want the cops to stop the show and drive patrons to demand their money back. The banter between the theater manager and the detective is sneering and derisive to the point of wearying. “We got comics who are paid to be funny.”  “Don't get too close to her. She'll mistake you for King Kong”

Mind, I’m not saying the low moral tone should be deplored, per our enlightened attitudes (which will probably make our descendants squirm). I mean, I assumed this would be silly from the get-go, so I was not disappointed, though the last 15 minutes had me thinking about brushing my teeth.